On Days that I am Working

This morning while walking around the giant store I work in I realized something.

I wake up when you are going to bed or are falling asleep.
I take my first break you are just waking up.
I take my lunch break when you are clocking in.
I clock out and head home when you're on your lunch break.
I go to bed when you other nine-to-fivers are just getting home.

Yesterday at work a co-worker asked me if I voted for Obama and then, before I could answer, posed the follow-up "Wait, is it legal for you to vote here?" Not really thinking about what she meant by that I responded with, "Duh, I'm 26!" while pointing at my bearded face (and body). She was kind of caught off guard by my response and it took me a moment to realize she had been assuming that I was either a) an illegal alien, or b) an intergalactic alien. Either way though, she definitely didn't think I was an American citizen. Oh wells that ends wells.

Dear Ocean

“…the Japanese Spider Crab has a body the size of a basketball and its legs can straddle a car. They will eventually measure a massive 15ft… The crab, called Macrocheira kaempferi in Latin, was caught by fishermen in the Pacific Ocean and has now been imported to Britain where it has gone on display at the National Sea Life Centre in Birmingham."(source)

Dear Ocean,

Fuck off. Seriously. Are you kidding me with this? Honestly, I've had enough of your bullshit. Let's find a way to get back to being all cute and Finding Nemoish again, because seriously, all of these new gigantic monsters you're creating are really starting to get on my nerves. I do not like being terrified constantly. Because of you, I'm considering a move further inland.

Please die already.

Love and tenderness,
Zuhair.

Oh Eric! Ya done did it again!

Here's Eric Wareheim's newish (I guess it's about 4 months old...whoops) video for the song "Keep it Going Louder" by them effing weirdos in Major Lazer. The video isn't really NSFW, unless you don't mind your coworkers thinking you're a deviant of some sort (sexual).

Here's another video he did for them a while back. This one is, well, yes, most definitely NSFW and is possibly NSFA (A = anywhere).

Major Lazer "Pon De Floor" from Eric Wareheim on Vimeo.

Community

Community has become one of my favorite new sitcoms. It took me a while to admit this. It's fairly standardly paced and at times it seems to be yearning for a laugh track. The more I watched it though, the more I enjoyed it. I guess I owe that to having seen Donald Glover (who plays Troy, the football jock) perform a couple of times at the UCB Theatre. He was so dang funny, I had to start paying closer attention to the show. And, boyohboy, amigladidid.

It's not always great, but when it's good, it's damn good. The show is a ridiculous comedy, not trying very hard to be anything other than funny. It's got a good dose of meta in it, and it's self-referencing is gosh darn hi-larious. Once critics started pointing out pure character stereotypes on the show, they embraced the eff out of them. Somewhere around midseason, this show started getting really good.

In a perfect world, Chevy Chase would have never been added to the cast, but oh wells. My favorite character is easily Señor Chang, played by Ken Jeong. This isn't a character you've never seen before. Many shows have featured the angrier-than-is-necessary-teacher character. But Ken's play on this old archetype is fantastic. Also, he very much reminds me of what I think my friend James would be like as a teacher of any sort. Is that racist? It's probably racist. Alright, time to stop using words like "archetype" and to start watching some dang clips!







Community is on Hulu. I think. Watch it if you'd like. Other than that, it's on NBC, Thursday nights, either right before or after 30 Rock.

This is how big of a nerd I am.

Google - How to Impress a French Woman

This video made me smile way more than it needed to. I guess there's still a little Nerd City left in me after all...

Boring, dumb, and fine, it's been a long time my friend

Thanks for the recommendation, YouTube! Sometimes I can't help but feel like you're the only website that, you know, really gets me.

Actually, you were pretty spot on with most of the rest of them recommendations. I suppose everyone is allowed to be wrong every once in a while, even the robots at The You Tube.

p.s. this is the only reason I have Photoshop.